Miscarriage can feel like an unsutured wound, open ended, or even like a bad dream. This is in part because there are not any rituals around it. Saying goodbye is imperative to your healing; physically, mentally, and emotionally. I highly recommend beginning or continuing a mindfulness practice, but also choosing a way to create closure.
Personally I found lighting candles and thanking the little soul, as well as my body, brought healing even though it was the last thing I wanted to do in that moment. This doesn’t take away the super shitty feelings, but it cultivates healing, gratitude, and forgiveness. Here are some ideas: Light a candle and say a prayer Write a letter to yourself, your future self, or the baby Write a list of what you are feeling Create a death certificate (ok, I know this may sound morbid, but it really helps some people, especially the partner) Buy an ornament for your holiday tree as a little reminder Anything else that feels right! When you need to go to the emergency room:
If you feel disoriented, lose consciousness, develop a fever, begin hemorrhaging, or if you feel you want medical attention. Warning signs: feeling spacey, very sleepy, incoherent, unusually anxious, becoming pale, soaking a pad in 30 minutes, bleeding steadily for more than 2 hours without passing the tissue, or developing a fever. Seek immediate medical attention for any of these concerns. 1-4 weeks is all within the realm of normal- as long as you are not having heavy bleeding, large clots or fever, possibly pointing to retained products of conception. Contact your health care provider if any of this applies.
|
AuthorMelissa Wittman is the founder of One Generation and its current initiative, Managing Miscarriage. Archives
March 2018
Categories |